Mike, Heather, and Melchi

yes, it's difficult

2010-03-10T05:54:51Z

I want to post a little bit about a certain subject, because I feel like little is said on the subject in our little world. That subject is, making the transition to mommyhood, especially as an...older mom (30+ or so - in Albuquerque, this makes you a grandmother). I've surmised from talking to others and from web forums that my reactions are not rare.

It's rough. I don't know how many times I have mourned the loss of my old life and my ability to do as I please, accomplish things as I see fit. I got so incredibly nervous as Melchi's due date neared, feeling so unprepared. Afterward, I had silent fits as the house sat a wreck for months (and don't even get me started on the unorganized areas). I've had non-silent tirades about my frustrations, which poor Melchi and Mike have had to endure.

Sometimes, the response I get is to do the popular American think, which is to think we can have children conveniently and simply shuffle them off to the sidelines of life as babies while we continue as normal, almost as if nothing miraculous happened when they came into our lives. Meanwhile, many mothers in this country quietly make their children the center of their lives, whether they always enjoy this or not. We do this because we feel it's the right thing to do and that there is no other option. We realize that as they grow older, we'll have more "free time" to do our own thing again. But when the situation demands it, we must put aside some of our tasks to tend to the emotional needs of a baby. At times, we must also ignore the house as we catch up on our sleep.

What I'm saying is, yes, I haven't had a day without Melchi since he was born, and I don't want one. But I have minimum periods of time that I require here and there alone to feel "normal" again. Even so, I don't feel like my mental mom conversion is complete, but I'm a lot farther along than I was several months ago.

Friday fun: aquarium (Newport) and Albany

2010-03-06T05:19:25Z

A couple of weeks ago, on a lovely sunny Friday, we took off to Newport to visit the aquarium. I know now that it's possible for the sun to shine on the coast! Melchi looked overhead at sharks in a tank from his passenger post in the Ergo and particularly enjoyed the auklets . I learned about the chiton (ky-ton) - and touched one in a special pool. It looked hard and spiky but was rather soft. On the food front, our lunch at the Rogue Brewery was overpriced and disappointing (no beer...what?).

Today, another sunny Friday, we all hit Albany. Mike worked in the coffeehouse while Melchi and I went shopping. For the first time in 179 years, I went antique/junk browsing. Albany has a number of stores in this range. I was in the market for egg cups and small wooden furniture appropriate for a certain cutie to climb on, but no dice.

Oh, but I did find some lovely things for Melchi in the downtown toy store! You'll notice that we have a certain animal obsession around here: I got squirting tub toys (3 pigs), a bubble wand, and a Wheely Cow. What's that, you say? http://wheelybug.com/products.html It was difficult to choose, but in the end, the Holstein won. I think these are the same little cars Melchi and I encountered at the Play Factory in Corvallis last week, when I thought he might get run over in the little car area (too many older kids for babies to feel safe). Speaking of such outings, Melchi is a sociable child with no sign of separation anxiety, as he crawls away from me speedily to make new friends. How this happened from me and Mike, I'll never know.

exciting farm developments

2010-03-02T06:15:10Z

We may have more chickens as well as some pigs this year. Before that, though, we need fence. And we almost have a deal worked out to get fence (electric) around the whole place, plus some non-electric fence around our "yard."

Our current hens continue to produce more than enough eggs for our use. Thank you, chickens! We appreciate you!

We'll definitely have a garden. Next up, as soon as it's dry enough: rototilling to break the sod and kill the grass. The compost is in place, and we have our fertilizer components. After that, planting! We want to grow nearly all of our own vegetables this year. Two books we're referencing are Steve Solomon's Gardening When It Counts: Growing Food in Hard Times and Growing Vegetables West of the Cascades. These are specific to our region and focus on low-water organic gardening.

just stuff, February 2010 edition

2010-02-12T06:25:18Z

Whee, nothing too exciting going on this week. Playing, cleaning, mountains of laundry, making food, organizing (every so slowly), creating the garden plan, working on Melchi's sleep (I've been referring to the No Cry Sleep Solution).

It looks like all 4 of Melchi's top incisors are coming in at once! Finally bought some Motrin for him! I tried so hard to avoid the pain drugs, going with homeopathic drops and stuff to chew on, but he's been crying several times a night. I figure the drugs are better than the stress all of that causes him during the night. This is really the root cause of the sleep problems. The rest is just getting him used to other sleep associations so I don't have to do the breastfeeding during the occasional entire nap - strangely, his night sleep has been better in that regard for a long time, just not the daytime naps.

I'm also working on uploading movies to SmugMug. It's been a long, painful process. Some of the movies (all made with the iPhone) are turned the wrong way, so I've been learning to use iMovie to rotate them. This sounds really lame, except when you consider how little computer time I get. Something I've learned: babies aren't particularly compatible with computer use.

swimming

2010-02-06T03:56:52Z

For the past five weeks, I took Melchi to a parent-baby swim class at the Stayton pool. Mike and I want Melchi to be comfortable in the water as soon as possible, while being held by one of his loving parents, so he can ease into swimming. This means one of us will take Melchi into the pool regularly, at least once a week.

In this baby swim class, the parent holds and instructs the child two days each week for half hour sessions. With Melchi so young (babies can start at 6 months), this means moving him around the water while he kicks and splashes and plays with toys. Part of the attraction of the class is when the instructor demonstrates submerging the child: warn baby with something like "ready, set, go," which he eventually associates with "I'm about to go under water"; blow in the child's face so he takes a breath; gently and smoothly move him into and out of the water; and afterward, pat his back to help him get rid of any inhaled water. Parents are also shown how to help baby relax on his back and eventually learn to float, keeping baby's head next to parent's or on parent's chest. At the end of class, parent and child go down the water slide together.

I enjoyed taking Melchi to this class, though Melchi had mixed reactions. I think the class is held at an awkward time of day for babies, 5:30 pm. Melchi is often tired and winding down at that time, and going to class meant abbreviating our dinner and bedtime routine. Often, Melchi fell asleep on the drive back, and a few times, I carried Melchi straight into bed from the car. While he never seemed traumatized by the activities, he did not enjoy being submerged (understandably) and still makes unhappy noises when placed on his back. I think the environment, especially the noise and other people, was overwhelming to him.

We won't be attending the next session - I missed the short window for signing up, as this popular class fills quickly. I'm going to request a morning class, because the instructor is available to teach, but the pool already has a full schedule and little open swim time. As for me and Melchi, we'll go to an open swim period earlier in the day and practice having fun in the water, repeating what we've already done. Then, one day, Melchi will swim away from me happily...maybe!

Mike enjoyed taking pictures of our splashing. Photos website (photos.garfias.org)

new photos, 1 Feb 2010

2010-02-02T05:18:52Z

If it's been a while since you've been to photos.garfias.org you may have noticed some things. Here's what's been going on.

Our first professional family photos have been placed into their own album. They're still in the 2009 group for the purpose of tracking requested ones by number.

We're in the process of taming the mess of photos in Melchi 2009. There are too many, lots of extremely similar ones, and other things that bother me.

The ones you probably care most about are in Melchi 2010.

New photos:

Sledding at Hoodoo (yesterday)

Melchi asleep on the floor, playing in the dishwasher, swinging around, eating, playing in dog food, etc.

Melchi and I at the Stayton swimming pool baby group

I encourage you to buy prints (if you want them) from the 2010 group. These were taken with the Canon 20D, our fabulous new camera! These should print pretty well, as long as they were in focus.

finally introducing our family blog

2010-02-02T05:11:29Z

New year, new posts. I didn't post much last year, but I intend to post more this year. I'll keep you updated on picture additions to our photo website, photos.garfias.org and other goings-on around our farm. Speaking of our farm, it needs a name. Hmm...

Right now, we're fighting with the photo printer. Mike and I were finally going to print pictures we promised people around New Year's. Looks like our printer is a big pain in the rear. I think we'll be ordering prints from now on. They've gotten to be so cheap.

Did you notice that you can order prints through SmugMug? On our photo website (photos.garfias.org) you can order all kinds of photo products using SmugMug. Some of the products, like calendars, aren't obvious. Ask one of us if there's something you're looking for and you can't find it.

Heather and Melchi at Silver Falls State Park

2009-08-23T05:53:11Z

Fence Quote

2009-08-17T02:52:09Z

We got a quote for fence this weekend. For the whole perimeter, plus two 16' gates, one 14' gate, one 4' gate, and removal of the old craptastic field fence/vinyl fence it was $11,000.

Now I need to figure out how to pay for it.

Melchi

2009-08-06T15:18:01Z